Friday, June 26, 2015

Cheese and peanut butter are not enemies.

This may be the most important sentence you read today:

Cheese and peanut butter are not enemies.

At least, they don't have to be. In fact, in the right circumstances, they can be downright good friends.

Let that sink in for a minute. (And yeah, I'm talkin' to you, SANDWICH.)

Okay, check it. For years, there have been two categories of sandwiches: those you could add cheese to, and those you could add peanut butter to. They have been wholly separate categories, separated by the dividing line between sweet and savory.

I recently discovered a secret, in my journey through the wonders/horrors of "natural" peanut butter: peanut butter can be either sweet or savory. We've known this secret about cheese for years, ever since New York cheesecake and mascarpone began starring in our desserts. Look, brethren: something in common!

This isn't as unprecedented as it may seem. These two fat-packed ingredients (hey, fat's not a bad thing - whatchoo know 'bout that keto) have shared a bed before - one you may remember from your childhood days of illegally collecting roly-polies in summer camp:
Sure, they weren't the ones with the peanut butter cookies on the outside, so they may not have been as coveted. But they were GOOD, and they introduced me to a world where peanut butter and cheese didn't have to live as enemies.

If Austin (or Lance, as your school's vendor agreement might dictate) could make it work, why couldn't I? And what do millions of party platters with nuts parked right next to cheddar cubes have to say on the subject?

Intrigued, I took a Sargento stick of Colby Jack and, with some measure of trepidation, stuck it directly into the peanut butter jar. Damn the torpedoes.

Verdict? Delicious.

The next level: peanut butter grilled cheese. Yes, you can. Don't be afraid, my loves. Simply slather some peanut butter on your bread (I prefer lightly pre-toasted), throw on a few slices of cheese and grill as normal. The melty mixture will make you forget everything you've been taught. 

Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall. Today is the day when our sandwich ingredients unite, not divide, and learn to live in fatty, tasty harmony.

Now let's top it with mayo! Wait, WHAT?

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